“Surviving the Grizzly” Handling Aggressive Clients | Part Three: Know When to Play Dead.
We’ve talked about strategies for handling aggressive clients, like staying calm and not running and making yourself look large. This month, we wrap up the series with the all- important reminder to, when all else fails, play dead. Well, okay…maybe not exactly. What we really mean is that, by listening and keeping your wits about you, you can de-escalate the situation.
Emotions Create Tension
When you react with frustration, anger, or defensiveness, you almost always make the situation worse. The grizzly client is emotional and they are expecting you to be, too. They’re looking for a fight. But when you respond calmly you break the cycle of negativity. Focus on resolution and stay away from snapping back or rushing to defend yourself.
Defuse the Situation with Active Listening
As hard as it may be, let the client vent. Nod along, interject short, affirmative statements like, “I see,” and let them be heard. Don’t interrupt. Once they’ve tired themselves out, repeat the concerns and commiserate with them. “Yes, I’d be frustrated too, if I were in your shoes.” Don’t dismiss an angry client’s concerns. Instead, validate it.
Practice Patience and Empathy
Being patient and empathetic will serve you well in the moment, but will also build trust for the future. Showing real concern for a hot-under-the-collar client’s frustrations demonstrates emotional intelligence. It’s important to remember, too, that you can agree to disagree. You can listen to concerns and validate their feelings, building long-term trust, without falling on your sword.
While surviving an encounter with a hungry bear doesn’t immediately seem to have a lot in common with facing angry clients, you can’t deny the parallels once you look deeper. Remember to stay calm, don’t cower, be confident, and listen without reaction and no one – a bear or a client – will be having you as their next meal.
